If you want to get yourself a really shit plate, it's best to visit a popular auction site as they have a huge number of plates that are utter bollocks.

The following pages are dedicated to some of the most foolish plates on offer that only a nobcheese would consider purchasing and actually displaying on their car.

There are so many of these plates on auction sites, that only a splattering will be displayed here.

ST04 OLF - Do you drive a VW Golf??? or Do you love the sport of GOLF??? Or better still - have you answered yes to any of these questions and even go by the name of STUART?!?

THEN THIS PRIVATE REGISTRATION MAY BE FOR YOU!

ST04 OLF = STU GOLF or ST0 GOLF or STU 4OLF.

Originally purchased from the DVLA for £500 we now no longer own the VW GOLF this plate belonged to - so it's up for grabs at a give away price!! best offers welcome. Advertised on other cherished registration sites and valued at £1000!!!

GRAB YOURSELF A BARGAIN - make you VW golf stand out in the crowd.

CH4VPL4TE: UP FOR £400 - didn't sell - No Suprise there!

Cherished number plate L8 YUS for sale,on retention, with assingment fee paid, ready to be assigned to a car.

Ideal registration to conceal the age of your Lotus, I had this on my S1 Elise (sadly gone now).

No reserve, grab a bargain plate for your Elise, ready for the summer!

CH4VPL4TE: All the effort to lift it from a 1994 car and it sold for £290. Even has a bolt through the 8 in a poor attempt to resemble an O - obviously forgot about the Y which of course needs to be a T. What utter shit.

Unlike cars there is only 1 of these.....

Up for auction is a great head turning personal number plate HI2 OVE, Obviously this reads HI LOVE. My wife has had this on hers cars for some years now and has bought a new reg with her name on, if we had another car we would keep it as the prices for number plates like these are becomming great investments and increase in value. We have had so many great comments on this number plate and will be greatly missed.

CH4VPL4TE: was up for £1 starting bid. Didn't sell - maybe because it's a load of wank. It must have got so many 'comments' because it's so very crap.

I am selling my number plate I have had on my car for the past 2 years.I get loads of looks by other motorists and passers by Because you look like a cock

The plate looks great. I have a difference of opinion!

The number is actually J6 EPV but the way it is spaced, as you can see in the picture, looks like JEEP V knob

I am starting the bidding off at just £495 with no reserve

CH4VPL4TE: didn't sell because again it looks shit and again it gets looked at because people can't beleive how much of a twat this numberplate makes you look!

M19 NGE - As you can see, works well with no playing about - Apart from having to squash it all together - and having a '9' in it - or did you miss that bit?

Ive had this plate for a few years now and it always raises eyebrows and huge smiles. I have people taking photos all the time, even while I am driving - I would have taken a photo of you and stuck it in Cunt Of The Month if I'd come across you.

The double takes people do are soooo funny. Some people dont like it and go out of their way to shake their head at you but this just adds to the comical value!! most people just laugh though, I see thumbs and smiles all the time!"

£1700 - Didn't sell - wonder why?

MINI COOPER S NUMBER PLATE ON RETENTION

M111 YCS -READS MINY CS - no it fucking doesn't you complete moron. It reads M111 YCS! The joker wanted £600 for this pile of crap - didn't sell.

Cherished Number Plate J15 HNG (JOHN G).  Great looking plate. Shit looking plate.

This plate would make an excellent gift,but only if you want to make someone look and feel like a complete cunt

Up for £250 - didn't sell. Suprised as I see shit like this all the time!

I AM SELLING MY NUMBER PLATE AS I HAVE HAD IT 4 YEARS AND TOO MANY PEOPLE RECOGNISE ME AND I GET ALOT OF ATTENTION WHICH I DONT NEED LOL!! Do they say "Look - there's Karl - what a cunt"?

NO TO BE FAIR THIS IS A FAB NUMBER PLATE AND ALOT OF PEOPLE DO COMMENT ON IT! see above.

£400 - didn't sell.

J3 HNE

Thats all the aution said. It was enough not to sell it at £900!

B19 RBC

Cherished number held on RETENTION CERTIFICATE for BARBARA C ! Great gift for an Lady if you want her to look and feel like a sack of shit. VERY LOW RESERVE for an outstanding fucking shitty plate. Unfortunately, you are only bidding for the plate, NOT the CAR!! Wouldn't want the plate - cos it's crap.

Come on .... look at it and it went for £400 - laughing all the way to the bank!